Flowers, candy, wine and champagne are staged in almost every aisle of the grocery store. Hearts adorn display windows in the mall. Sales representatives at Tiffany’s are putting in the hours – Jared’s and Pandora too. The parking lots of the adult toy stores are full and the not-so-secret lingerie shop is overrun with…men.

It’s the weekend before Valentine’s Day and the stores are filled with pink and red EVERYTHING.

The pressure is on for all husbands, boyfriends, significant others, and boo thangs to prove their love by shelling out the bucks in honor of Saint Valentine. Who, by the way, may be a fictitious character invented by poet Chaucer around 1375. Other accounts claim he was beheaded for illegally marrying couples in Rome during the third century. Really?

This “holiday” is also associated with a cute little Cupid holding a bow and drawing an arrow – ready to pierce unsuspecting hearts with love. Cupid is the Greek god of affection, love and romance and oddly enough, has nothing to do with Saint Valentine.

The valentine pressure is so great, An unnamed card company (the king of capitalizing on insecurities, sorrow and personal failure), has created a special holiday for singles. Singles Awareness Day whose acronym ironically spells S.A.D. Exactly.

That’s right, if you didn’t feel bad enough already, you can be honored for being too sorry to have a valentine. That’s worse than Charlie Brown being extra excited to receive that used Valentine’s Day card. On February 14th, single you and the other perceived relationship rejects can get together and commiserate – I mean commemorate your singlehood over cocktails and a movie. How thoughtful.

A “holiday” centered around a mysterious saint and a naked weapon toting cherub is sending a large majority of otherwise reasonable people into a pink and red, heart-shaped, sugary, flowery frenzy.

Which, from my observation, has nothing to do with love.

Or does it?

I’ve been taught that love always gives based on the scripture found in John 3:16 – ” For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” Now, that’s love. I have three sons and I’m not giving up nary a one for any of you. Believe that!

In her book All About Love: New Vision, bell hooks said, “The word “love” is most often defined as a noun, yet all the more astute theorists of love acknowledge that we would all love better if we used it as a verb.”

I believe we should agree love is an action word. When we use the phrase ‘I love you’, we have a noun (I), a verb (love), and a pronoun (you) which is the direct object of the verb (love). Isn’t that what Valentine’s Day is all about?

So maybe – just maybe, husbands, boyfriends, significant others, boo thangs AND singles are all onto something. Giving gifts and spending time with each other on this one day designated for demonstrating love is actually showing love!

Making the effort to give your loved one something because you think it will make them happy (and keep you from sleeping on the sofa), is a genuine show of affection. And that’s what we all want isn’t it? Love?

Can we take it one tiny step further. Can we demonstrate love for each other in all of our relationships on a regular basis (is daily too much to ask?)? Perhaps there won’t be so much pressure and SADness on this one day if we show more KINDness towards each other every day.

I personally like Valentine’s Day and I’m single (and not the least bit SAD). The day I took down my Christmas wreath, I immediately replaced it with a heart wreath. So I’m not hating AT ALL. We need all the love we can get in this sometimes wicked world. I’m simply suggesting we show love and kindness a little more often. To couples and singles alike.

It has nothing to do with me feeling uncomfortable watching your man fumbling over the unmentionables in Victoria’s Secret and asking me for advice. About your underwear.

Happy Valentine’s Day!
Love,
Robin ❤